Wannaskan Almanac for Tuesday, January 23, 2024 How Amazon Ruined Christmas

It is sure easy to order things on Amazon.  This year I ordered many items for my family and friends.  Then, as items started to show up on my doorstep, I realized that I had made a mistake.  Shopping on Amazon had not made Christmas shopping easier.  It had actually ruined Christmas!

I suppose, as Paul Harvey says, you want to know the rest of the story.  Well, here it goes.  It is very handy and quick to do your Christmas shopping on Amazon.  There are problems though.  For instance, if you order a pair of shoes or pants or any other item of clothing you don't get to try it on first. But that isn't what ruined Christmas for me.  It is my dwindling ability to remember things.  

I went to Amazon and ordered some things.  I got some delicious chocolates for my mom.  I found some really cool lures for my fishing buddy.  I ordered some jeans for my wife.  Then I sat back, satisfied, and announced that I was finished shopping.

At my age, I quickly forget that I have ordered from Amazon.  A few days after I order a box or two or three show up on my doorstep.  Having forgotten that I ordered these items as gifts I open them and start to enjoy the gifts inside.  Delicious chocolates.  Fishing lures.  A strangely tight pair of pants that I was unable to remove after getting them on.  Who could have sent me these presents?

My wife came home and after a great deal of struggling and damage was able to get those now useless jeans off of me.  Might have been easier but I had just eaten a box of chocolates.  The lures were damaged when I fell on them in an attempt to wriggle out of my pants prison.  

Christmas shopping was not over.  Well, it was over for me...but not for my lovely wife.  She ordered another box of chocolates and some more fishing lures and had them delivered to the proper recipient's addresses.  Then she went to the store, bought herself some new jeans, wrapped them, and put them under the tree.  

So before you shop at Amazon make sure you know what you are getting yourself into. I have already started shopping for next year, but I have learned my lesson.  I am only buying stuff for me.  Merry Christmas Mr. Hot Coco! 

***Note***The Wannaskan Almanac gets 10% of all Christmas orders placed by clicking on the links above.  That money goes to help support prolific liars like Mr. Hot Coco.  Your support is appreciated!