And here is the Wannaskan Almanac for Word-Wednesday, for July 3, 2019, the 27th Wednesday of the year, the 184th day of the year, with 181 days remaining.
Nordhem Lunch: Hot Ham Sandwich w/Potatoes & Gravy
Earth/Moon Almanac for July 3, 2019
Sunrise: 5:26am; Sunset: 9:30pm; 1 minute, 3 seconds less daylight today
Moonrise: 8:35pm; Moonset: 9:50am, waxing crescent
Bug Temperature Almanac for July 3, 2019
Average Record Today
High 77 90 75
Low 56 38 58
Nordhem Lunch: Hot Ham Sandwich w/Potatoes & Gravy
Earth/Moon Almanac for July 3, 2019
Sunrise: 5:26am; Sunset: 9:30pm; 1 minute, 3 seconds less daylight today
Moonrise: 8:35pm; Moonset: 9:50am, waxing crescent
Bug Temperature Almanac for July 3, 2019
Average Record Today
High 77 90 75
Low 56 38 58
July 3 Celebrations from National Day Calendar
- National Fried Clam Day
- National Eat Your Beans Day
- National Chocolate Wafer Day
- Sidewalk Egg Frying Day
July 3 Riddle
Why is a dog dressed more warmly in summer than he is in winter?*
July 3 Pun
Doctor Bob regularly stopped off at his favorite bar for a hazelnut daiquiri on his way home from the clinic every evening. Bartender Betty would always have the drink ready at precisely 5:03pm.
One afternoon, just as he was preparing Dr. Bob’s drink, Betty was dismayed to find that she was out of hazelnut extract. Thinking quickly, she made a daiquiri with hickory nuts and set it on the bar just as Dr. Bob came in the door.
Dr. Bob smiled, took a sip of his drink, and then frowned. “This isn’t a hazelnut daiquiri!”
“No, I’m so sorry, replied Betty, “It’s a hickory daiquiri, doc.”
June 3 Shut-up Joke
“Mommy, is Daddy really dead?”
Mommy: “Shut-up and keep digging.”
[Courtesy of WannaskaWriter’s sister, Ginger.]
July 3 Notable Historic Events, Literary or Otherwise, from On This Day
July 3 Pun
Doctor Bob regularly stopped off at his favorite bar for a hazelnut daiquiri on his way home from the clinic every evening. Bartender Betty would always have the drink ready at precisely 5:03pm.
One afternoon, just as he was preparing Dr. Bob’s drink, Betty was dismayed to find that she was out of hazelnut extract. Thinking quickly, she made a daiquiri with hickory nuts and set it on the bar just as Dr. Bob came in the door.
Dr. Bob smiled, took a sip of his drink, and then frowned. “This isn’t a hazelnut daiquiri!”
“No, I’m so sorry, replied Betty, “It’s a hickory daiquiri, doc.”
June 3 Shut-up Joke
“Mommy, is Daddy really dead?”
Mommy: “Shut-up and keep digging.”
[Courtesy of WannaskaWriter’s sister, Ginger.]
July 3 Notable Historic Events, Literary or Otherwise, from On This Day
- 1767 Norway's oldest newspaper still in print, Adresseavisen, is founded.
- 1839 First US state normal school opens in Lexington, Massachusetts, with 3 students.
- 1861 Pony Express arrives in San Francisco with overland letters from New York.
- 1978 US Supreme Court rules 5-4, FCC had a right to reprimand a New York radio station WBAI for broadcasting George Carlin's "Filthy Words".
- 1802 Joseph Labitzky, Bohemian composer, born in Krásno, Czech Republic.
- 1854 Leoš Janáček, Czech composer.
- 1883 Franz Kafka, Czech author.
- 1937 Tom Stoppard, Czech-born British playwright.
Words-I-Looked-Up-This-Week Writer's Challenge
Make a single sentence (or poem) from the following words:
- alluvium: a deposit of clay, silt, sand, and gravel left by flowing streams in a river valley or delta, typically producing fertile soil.
- capitonym: A word that changes sound and/or meaning when the case is changed; a case-sensitive word, e.g., Sherpa: one of the ethnic groups native to the most mountainous regions of Nepal and the Himalaya, vis a vis sherpa: a person providing support for foreign trekkers and mountain climbers.
- congery: a collection of items or parts in one mass; assemblage; aggregation; heap.
- ex cathedra: with the full authority of office (especially of the Pope’s infallibility as defined in Roman Catholic doctrine).
- festschrift: a collection of writings published in honor of a scholar.
- hobnail: a short heavy-headed nail used to reinforce the soles of boots.
- mendicant: a beggar.
- piles: hemorroids.
- pussivanting: adj. and n., that fusses, intrudes, or causes a disturbance; interfering, meddling.
- tabard: a sleeveless jerkin consisting only of front and back pieces with a hole for the head.
July 3 Word-Wednesday Feature
Since it's Franz Kafka's birthday, and given Wannanka's current bug-friendly conditions, Word-Wednesday features his story, The Metamorphosis, for your summer reading pleasure:
One morning, as Gregor Samsa was waking up from anxious dreams, he discovered that in bed he had been changed into a monstrous verminous bug. He lay on his armour-hard back and saw, as he lifted his head up a little, his brown, arched abdomen divided up into rigid bow-like sections. From this height the blanket, just about ready to slide off completely, could hardly stay in place. His numerous legs, pitifully thin in comparison to the rest of his circumference, flickered helplessly before his eyes.
‘What’s happened to me,’ he thought. It was no dream. His room, a proper room for a human being, only somewhat too small, lay quietly between the four well-known walls. Above the table, on which an unpacked collection of sample cloth goods was spread out (Samsa was a traveling salesman) hung the picture which he had cut out of an illustrated magazine a little while ago and set in a pretty gilt frame. It was a picture of a woman with a fur hat and a fur boa. She sat erect there, lifting up in the direction of the viewer a solid fur muff into which her entire forearm disappeared.
Gregor’s glance then turned to the window. The dreary weather (the rain drops were falling audibly down on the metal window ledge) made him quite melancholy. ‘Why don’t I keep sleeping for a little while longer and forget all this foolishness,’ he thought. But this was entirely impractical, for he was used to sleeping on his right side, and in his present state he couldn’t get himself into this position. No matter how hard he threw himself onto his right side, he always rolled again onto his back. He must have tried it a hundred times, closing his eyes, so that he would not have to see the wriggling legs, and gave up only when he began to feel a light, dull pain in his side which he had never felt before.
‘O God,’ he thought, ‘what a demanding job I’ve chosen! Day in, day out on the road. The stresses of trade are much greater than the work going on at head office, and, in addition to that, I have to deal with the problems of traveling, the worries about train connections, irregular bad food, temporary and constantly changing human relationships which never come from the heart. To hell with it all!’ He felt a slight itching on the top of his abdomen. He slowly pushed himself on his back closer to the bed post so that he could lift his head more easily, found the itchy part, which was entirely covered with small white spots (he did not know what to make of them), and wanted to feel the place with a leg. But he retracted it immediately, for the contact felt like a cold shower all over him.
He slid back again into his earlier position. ‘This getting up early,’ he thought, ‘makes a man quite idiotic. A man must have his sleep. Other traveling salesmen live like harem women.
For instance, when I come back to the inn during the course of the morning to write up the necessary orders, these gentlemen are just sitting down to breakfast. If I were to try that with my boss, I’d be thrown out on the spot. Still, who knows whether that mightn’t be really good for me. If I didn’t hold back for my parents’ sake, I would’ve quit ages ago. I would’ve gone to the boss and told him just what I think from the bottom of my heart. He would’ve fallen right off his desk! How weird it is to sit up at the desk and talk down to the employee from way up there. The boss has trouble hearing, so the employee has to step up quite close to him. Anyway, I haven’t completely given up that hope yet. Once I’ve got together the money to pay off the parents’ debt to him—that should take another five or six years—I’ll do it for sure. Then I’ll make the big break. In any case, right now I have to get up. My train leaves at five o’clock.’
And he looked over at the alarm clock ticking away by the chest of drawers. ‘Good God,’ he thought. It was half past six, and the hands were going quietly on. It was past the half hour, already nearly quarter to. Could the alarm have failed to ring? One saw from the bed that it was properly set for four o’clock. Certainly it had rung. Yes, but was it possible to sleep through this noise that made the furniture shake? Now, it’s true he’d not slept quietly, but evidently he’d slept all the more deeply. Still, what should he do now? The next train left at seven o’clock. To catch that one, he would have to go in a mad rush. The sample collection wasn’t packed up yet, and he really didn’t feel particularly fresh and active. And even if he caught the train, there was no avoiding a blow up with the boss, because the firm’s errand boy would’ve waited for the five o’clock train and reported the news of his absence long ago. He was the boss’s minion, without backbone or intelligence. Well then, what if he reported in sick? But that would be extremely embarrassing and suspicious, because during his five years’ service Gregor hadn’t been sick even once. The boss would certainly come with the doctor from the health insurance company and would reproach his parents for their lazy son and cut short all objections with the insurance doctor’s comments; for him everyone was completely healthy but really lazy about work. And besides, would the doctor in this case be totally wrong? Apart from a really excessive drowsiness after the long sleep, Gregor in fact felt quite well and even had a really strong appetite.
As he was thinking all this over in the greatest haste, without being able to make the decision to get out of bed (the alarm clock was indicating exactly quarter to seven) there was a cautious knock on the door by the head of the bed.
‘Gregor,’ a voice called (it was his mother!) ‘it’s quarter to seven. Don’t you want to be on your way?’ The soft voice! Gregor was startled when he heard his voice answering.
It was clearly and unmistakably his earlier voice, but in it was intermingled, as if from below, an irrepressibly painful squeaking which left the words positively distinct only in the first moment and distorted them in the reverberation, so that one didn’t know if one had heard correctly. Gregor wanted to answer in detail and explain everything, but in these circumstances he confined himself to saying, ‘Yes, yes, thank you mother. I’m getting up right away.’ Because of the wooden door the change in Gregor’s voice was not really noticeable outside, so his mother calmed down with this explanation and shuffled off. However, as a result of the short conversation the other family members became aware of the fact that Gregor was unexpectedly still at home, and already his father was knocking on one side door, weakly but with his fist. ‘Gregor, Gregor,’ he called out, ‘what’s going on?’ And after a short while he urged him on again in a deeper voice. ‘Gregor!’ Gregor!’ At the other side door, however, his sister knocked lightly. ‘Gregor? Are you all right? Do you need anything?’ Gregor directed answers in both directions, ‘I’ll be ready right away.’ He made an effort with the most careful articulation and by inserting long pauses between the individual words to remove everything remarkable from his voice. His father turned back to his breakfast. However, the sister whispered, ‘Gregor, open the door, I beg you.’ Gregor had no intention of opening the door, but congratulated himself on his precaution, acquired from traveling, of locking all doors during the night, even at home.
First he wanted to stand up quietly and undisturbed, get dressed, above all have breakfast, and only then consider further action, for (he noticed this clearly) by thinking things over in bed he would not reach a reasonable conclusion. He remembered that he had already often felt a light pain or other in bed, perhaps the result of an awkward lying position, which later turned out to be purely imaginary when he stood up, and he was eager to see how his present fantasies would gradually dissipate. That the change in his voice was nothing other than the onset of a real chill, an occupational illness of commercial travelers, of that he had not the slightest doubt.
It was very easy to throw aside the blanket. He needed only to push himself up a little, and it fell by itself. But to continue was difficult, particularly because he was so unusually wide. He needed arms and hands to push himself upright. Instead of these, however, he had only many small limbs which were incessantly moving with very different motions and which, in addition, he was unable to control. If he wanted to bend one of them, then it was the first to extend itself, and if he finally succeeded doing with this limb what he wanted, in the meantime all the others, as if left free, moved around in an excessively painful agitation. ‘But I must not stay in bed uselessly,’ said Gregor to himself.
At first he wanted to get of the bed with the lower part of his body, but this lower part (which he incidentally had not yet looked at and which he also couldn’t picture clearly) proved itself too difficult to move. The attempt went so slowly. When, having become almost frantic, he finally hurled himself forward with all his force and without thinking, he chose his direction incorrectly, and he hit the lower bedpost hard. The violent pain he felt revealed to him that the lower part of his body was at the moment probably the most sensitive.
Thus, he tried to get his upper body out of the bed first and turned his head carefully toward the edge of the bed. He managed to do this easily, and in spite of its width and weight his body mass at last slowly followed the turning of his head. But as he finally raised his head outside the bed in the open air, he became anxious about moving forward any further in this manner, for if he allowed himself eventually to fall by this process, it would take a miracle to prevent his head from getting injured. And at all costs he must not lose consciousness right now. He preferred to remain in bed.
However, after a similar effort, while he lay there again sighing as before and once again saw his small limbs fighting one another, if anything worse than before, and didn’t see any chance of imposing quiet and order on this arbitrary movement, he told himself again that he couldn’t possibly remain in bed and that it might be the most reasonable thing to sacrifice everything if there was even the slightest hope of getting himself out of bed in the process. At the same moment, however, he didn’t forget to remind himself from time to time of the fact that calm (indeed the calmest) reflection might be better than the most confused decisions. At such moments, he directed his gaze as precisely as he could toward the window, but unfortunately there was little confident cheer to be had from a glance at the morning mist, which concealed even the other side of the narrow street. ‘It’s already seven o’clock’ he told himself at the latest striking of the alarm clock, ‘already seven o’clock and still such a fog.’ And for a little while longer he lay quietly with weak breathing, as if perhaps waiting for normal and natural conditions to re-emerge out of the complete stillness.
But then he said to himself, ‘Before it strikes a quarter past seven, whatever happens I must be completely out of bed. Besides, by then someone from the office will arrive to inquire about me, because the office will open before seven o’clock.’ And he made an effort then to rock his entire body length out of the bed with a uniform motion. If he let himself fall out of the bed in this way, his head, which in the course of the fall he intended to lift up sharply, would probably remain uninjured. His back seemed to be hard; nothing would really happen to that as a result of the fall. His greatest reservation was a worry about the loud noise which the fall must create and which presumably would arouse, if not fright, then at least concern on the other side of all the doors.
Interested readers can Czech out the remainder of the story here.
From A Year with Rilke, July 3 Entry
The Gift of Exploration, from Uncollected Poems.
Dove that stayed in the open, outside the dovecote,
brought back and housed again
where neither night nor day poses danger—
she know what protection is…
The other doves not exposed to peril
do not know this tenderness.
The heart that has been fetched back can feel most at home.
Vitality is freed through what it has renounced.
Over Nothingness the universe bends.
Ah, the ball we dared to throw
fills the hands differently on its return:
it brings back the reality of its journey.
Be better than yesterday, learn a new word today, try to stay out of trouble - at least until tomorrow, and write when you have the time.
*Because in winter he wears a fur coat, and in summer he wears a fur coat and pants.
ReplyDeleteTo get rid of my piles I went far far away.
Doc said sit on Mt. Everest a night and a day.
The first thing I saw as I trudged the alluvium,
Was a local captonym, looking surly and glum.
I got mendicanty, I was needing a sherpa
"I'm no two legged mule!"
He was hot, ex cathedra.
"I'm a full-blooded male from the tribe they call Sherpa.
"So don't mix me up with some dusty old Ghurka.
"I'm headed up north to the old town of Lhasa.
"They're throwing a festschriff for our clan's top dog pasha.
"Us sherps will show up in some droves and some congeries.
"The pasha is ticked, he hates all the pussivantities.
"But I got some new hobnails for dear, dear old massa,
"And a tabard real nice, that reads "World's Greatest Pasha."
Piles: hemorrhoids
Alluvium: silt deposits
Captonym: word with two meanings
Ex cathedra: speak with authority
Festschriff: intellectuals' excuse for a party
Congery: piles of things
Pussivantity: disturbance
Hobnail: nail for boot heel
Tabard: sleeveless tee
One of my favorite parts of reading your Word-Wednesday poems is seeing what topic(s) you use to anchor your poetic narrative. Namaste!
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DeleteThank you. The definition for capitonym was made to order.
The Muse surprises me every week.
I agree with W's Child. Half the fun of reading your word-struck poems (or is it word-stuck poems) - anyway, the fun arises from the ever-present theme - dare I say, plot - with which you organize (i.e., anchor) your creation. This one is particularly grandiose.
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