A Perfect Avocado

 Avocados can cause problems at our house. We eat them happily and variously: sprinkled with crushed pepper on morning eggs; tucked into lunchtime sandwiches; or crushed into guacamole with before-dinner-chips. Given our enthusiasm, invariably, we overbuy. We wait for them to ripen; get busy and forget that they are on the counter doing so. Because we lose track of them, they get too soft, go brown, and we have to throw them into the compost pail (another place of rest on the counter, but still). 

 Not unlike the way I overbuy avocados, I can be bad at handling time. I love the busy, busy,  go, go, and then wonder why, like a neglected avocado, I’ve gone to mush. I become discouraged; get cranky and I don’t know exactly why. Dramatic stories swirl within. I should’ve, could've, would’ve done this or that differently. I ponder why he or she did or didn’t say this or that. I live crabbily (and must eventually apologize to anyone nearby me), I binge-watch something, eat mindlessly. Crash.

Turns out a simple explanation could be that I’m experiencing too much of a good thing; I’m too often alert, and focused, and the side effects, experts tell us, are (drum roll): anxiety and depression. Neuroscientists refer to this as a brain state called beta and the antidote is simple: Take a break. Stop the endless, stress-producing meetings; get off the zoom calls; shut the laptop. All of this beta activity causes our brains to get stuck in a threatened “fight or flight” mode. I’ve  simply got to learn better how to give my left brain a well-deserved rest.

I know when I’m smarter,  I can catch myself before I swirl down into the emotional vortex caused by a beta build up. Kinda like my attempt to watch out for my ripening, (beloved), avocados? I do try to notice, before it’s too late, and I’m off kilter and miserable. When I do this, when I change my mind intentionally, I’m also changing my brain for the better according to Rick Hanson, renowned neuropsychologist and author of the highly accessible book entitled, Buddha Brain. 

Choice! Who knew?!

 Turns out it’s not rocket science; it’s the science of neuroplasticity. There are all sorts of simple ways we can slow our brain's rhythms down from the stress of beta to the calm and peacefulness of alpha (and theta, etc.) brain waves. I cancel meetings and put down the devices that keep me all juped up. I end the zoom calls; walk outside and look up at the trees. I might garden, rake leaves or sweep the walk. I’ll iron wrinkled clothes; get out my starter and make some sour dough bread. I might even happily dig in and clean the kitchen. When I’m at my best, I’m more faithful to my practices. I take long walks, do chi-gong, meditate, pray, or journal. I listen to music, sit and stare at the clouds, the sea, a wall. When I do these things, I morph from, find[ing] myself sighing and frightened or full of argument, as Mary Oliver describes, and more like a bride married to amazement and a bridegroom, [able to] take the world into my arms.  

Last night, I caught a few avocados right on time. They were in the ideal state of yummy al dente semi-softness, and I made some guacamole. Right now, I got to enjoy some leftovers of it in a tasty egg sandwich (with melted cheese) that Jim made for my breakfast. I just finished eating it in bed while alternately drinking my second, steaming mug of tea. It’s pouring rain outside. The Strawberry Festival we planned to attend today  has been canceled. 

I get to lean back today, chill out, and do absolutely nothing (oh yeah, and write this piece for you). In my world? That’s a perfect avocado.

A Perfect Avocado