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Wannaskan Almanac for Tuesday, March 12, 2019

I am coughing.  No, I am not sick.  I am trying to force the last little morsels of the world's most dangerous cookie down my throat.  It isn't easy.  This dangerous cookie was introduced to our household by my darling wife...yes, the same woman who purchased the delicious crunchy cardboard known as lightly salted pistachios (for health reasons she claims) turned around and bought the most dangerous consumer item ever unleashed on humanity.  This item, of course, is the Limited Edition Most Stuf Oreo.
Each of these blood-sugar heightening treats checks in at 110 calories.  This in itself didn't scare me...I mean I can eat pop tarts and then brush my teeth with milkshakes...but the small size and exponential amount of sweetness is almost too much to bear.  The first thing I did after opening the package was a sigh of disappointment.  There are not very many cookies inside.  They are, however, very large.  

The picture you are looking at has not been doctored.  The missing cookies were consumed by my daughter, wife, and me the previous evening.  My wife and daughter each ate two, while I managed to choke down one.  I was pleasantly surprised to see them make it through the night without going into some sort of sugar-created hallucinations.  Just so you get a good idea of the size of the sugary filling, here is a picture of bigfoot standing beside one cookie.
As you can easily tell, this photo has not been doctored at all.  If Mr. Bigfoot did eat that cookie, well, he is either on a sugar-high created rampage or dead from diabetes.  Either way I don't think we will see him for a while.  
Actually, the cookies are a tine bit smaller than the photo makes them seem.  This is another photo which seems to show the cookies at a more manageable serving size.
As you can see, that is a lot of white stuff in there, but what else could we expect in an El Nino year?  The other thing that I am thinking about today is pickled herring.  I finally got a jar of pickled herring today.  I have spent months...make that years (my how time flies!)...and have finally got myself some of one of my favorite foods.
Let me be frank with you though.  Do not mix these with Most Stuf Oreos.  I would suggest waiting two to three days between having these two snacks.  If you have never had pickled herring, I would suggest giving it a try.  It is kind of like having lutefisk, except it tastes good.  
If you have survived eating pickled herring, Most Stuf Oreos, or a bigfoot sighting please comment below and tell us your story.




Comments

  1. Speaking of the most white stuff and pickled herring, WannaskaWriter is pickletured moving tons of white stuff on today's Wiktel home page: https://wiktel.com/

    ReplyDelete

  2. "Lasco Herring in wine sauce" are you out of your mind, laddie? There ain't no herring if it ain't OLSEN brand pickled HERRING" in the PARTY SIZE. You might have to eat that off-brand herring in Kansas, but 'ere in the true nort' (south of where yer from, originally) OLSEN's Pickled Herring is da only pickled herring to eat with Oreo cookies, Reese's Pieces, or T'ree Musketeer's chocolate bars. Say it ain't so, Yohnny! Say it ain't so!

    I can envision yer sweet ol' mother-in-law Marion Melvinsdottor just rollin' 'er eyes athinkin' as she probably is, why'n el yout ever evuntink to eat any ting else, but Olsen's Pickled Herring. Why she'd send youse a gallon or tew of it, iffn youse olnly ask, you needint go witout. Da Oreos, youse cangit fer yerself, garbage they be. She hopes yew treet yer dottir betr.

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