42 days have passed since the beginning of the roaring...or re-roaring 20's. It has been pretty boring for me. I guess I kind of thought there would be more dancing and flashy dressing gangsters. Oh well, maybe in 2120.
Today is the 52nd day of winter. In Wannaska, it seems like it is the 52nd week of winter. One year on Neptune lasts for 164 Earth years. The winters there would last for about 40 earth years. That is why nobody lives there...far too monotonous and too many episodes of cabin fever.
The term cabin fever has existed since about 1900. Nobody really knows who first coined the term, but it is likely to have originated out of Wannaska. Cabin fever refers to the isolation experienced by people who have spent too long indoors, usually due to extremely cold conditions outside. According to Wannaskan historians, the only known cure for cabin fever is a shopping trip trip to Thief River Falls.
While you are in Thief River Falls, make sure you stop by Johnnie's Cafe. If you tell them that you are suffering from cabin fever and that you are a regular Wannaskan Almanac reader, they will look at you quizzically and wonder what the (edited) you are talking about.
Thanks to our vast array of media the cases of cabin fever have greatly decreased over the past several decades. There is, however, a close correlation between the rise in media and the increase in obesity. That is why I often encourage almanac readers to do some exercise...like a shake weight or a thigh master...while enjoying the best in Wannaskan wisdom.
If you are really talented, you can do both a shake weight and thigh master while you are reading the Wannaskan Almanac. It will stave of cabin fever and will make anyone who happens to walk in on you ask, "What the (edited) are you doing?!?" Freaking out your cabin mates is the ultimate way to cure cabin fever.
Today is the 52nd day of winter. In Wannaska, it seems like it is the 52nd week of winter. One year on Neptune lasts for 164 Earth years. The winters there would last for about 40 earth years. That is why nobody lives there...far too monotonous and too many episodes of cabin fever.
If you are really talented, you can do both a shake weight and thigh master while you are reading the Wannaskan Almanac. It will stave of cabin fever and will make anyone who happens to walk in on you ask, "What the (edited) are you doing?!?" Freaking out your cabin mates is the ultimate way to cure cabin fever.
If you freak out your cabin mates, you'll be shoved out the door to think things over. Take a long walk. That will alleviate your fever and also preclude the need for shake masters or thigh weights. For ongoing therapy, take a monthly shopping trip to Tough Rubber Balls as Mr. Hot Cocoa advises. And to feel extra virtuous, bring all your empty bottles along to recycle. When you stop in at Johnny's and mention "The Raven," they'll know exactly what you're talking about. If you're lucky they'll have a leftover potato dumpling to fry up, garnished with a half stick of butter. As you drive back to the cabin, spring will be one day closer (as will next winter).
ReplyDelete