The Palmville Globe Volume 2 Number 18
Man Becomes A Two Phone Operator
Joe McDonnell, 79 and a resident of Palmville Twp, Minnesota, recently acquired a new smartphone which proved problematical. "A friend recently acquired a new phone which she disliked," McDonnell tells reporters. "The phone was offered to me at a low price and the money I payed was donated to a dog shelter. My friend loved dogs. I had my phone number switched to the new phone and that worked fine, but I couldn't move my apps, pictures, etc. to the new phone until I deleted my friend's apps and pictures from her phone. To do that I needed her phone ID which could not be located. Paperwork was sent to the phone's maker and while I wait for the ID to be sent, I'm operating with two phones, one as a phone and the other as everything else." McDonnell says he feels like one of those business tycoons who were always portrayed talking into two phones at once. "Or like a secret service agent," he adds.
Man Engages in Tick Count
Joe McDonnell, 79 and an amateur entomologist, has been coping with a tick infestation this spring. "It's something we expect every year and something we strongly dislike," McDonnell tells reporters. "This is no consolation, but it is interesting that my wife gets more ticks than me, in a ratio of one for me and six for her. This year she bought a spray bottle of Sawyer™️ brand insect repellent. I skipped the repellent when I went through a field of tall grass and found six ticks on me that evening, one of which was attached. The next day I tried the spray. Four ticks emerged during the evening, two attached. I reread the instructions. I hadn't "shaken well" which could explain the spray's poor performance." In a later communication McDonnell recommends visiting ER if a red bullseye appears around a tick bite. "That could indicate the start of a Lyme's disease infection," he says. "Ticks are no joke."
Squib Cellar
Gas is too high!
Unblock the Straight and get the oil moving
The nuclear stuff sweep under rugs Persian
The midterms are coming! The midterms are coming!
Through obsessive dieting, the 800 lb. gorilla is reduced to the size of a little monkey. Though it’s now the monkey on our back.
We can ignore the elephant in the room until it sits on us, or goes number two.
The drama of evolution goes on out of sight behind the scenes.
Death pulls back the curtain.
The fate of nations is like that of sports teams - on top for a while, then down.
The good thing about sports is that bombs and missiles aren’t involved.
The purpose of religion is to die to self. I'm grateful to those who help me in that task by forgetting to respond to my texts, letters and voice mails.
If someone is telling a story don’t butt in. If they get the color of the shaggy dog wrong, let it go. It doesn't matter.
Any connection between the dead self and the 800lb gorilla?
ReplyDelete(No red bull’s eyes we hope?!)
" ... with a tick infestation this spring." Is a misnomer for suggesting 'this particular spring' is somehow different from all the other springs, on record, on the euphoric McDonnell estate in Eastern Palmville. As its former caretaker, I can -- and will -- attest to literal ladders of black-legged wood ticks from ground-level to windowsill framing the southeast corner of the 'leanto' on their 3-car garage. I have an image around here somewhere to prove it ... should someone doubt me. The only rational reason Mr. McDonnell would have less wood ticks on his self than HLW does is because he wears coveralls all summer at home to keep them at bay.
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