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Sunday News

 


The Palmville Globe Volume 2 Number 1


Man Reconsiders Track Lights

Joe McDonnell, 78 and a resident of Palmville Twp, Minnesota, recently removed two track lights from the TV room ceiling. "Just after we installed the lights twenty-five years ago as part of a complete remodel of the first floor of our house, a friend told me that track lighting was now passé," McDonnell tell the press. "We had another set of lights in the front hall area which opens into the dining area. Open plan design was hot then and I felt bad to have our remodel spoiled by non-trendy lights. However our budget was used up and we decided to leave the lights in place and not draw attention to them. Visitors who don't keep up with the latest design trends didn't even notice our faux pas. Some people said they they cool. Recently one of the lights burned out after 25 years. Only LED lights are available at the local store. I would have to replace the switch to use LED light whose light I find garish. An on line retailer has the old style lights available." In a follow up email McDonnell revealed that a design friend told him that track lighting is now considered modern, chic and desirable. 


Man Retrieves Generator from Remote Worksite

Joe McDonnell, 78 and not afraid of a challenge, recently hauled a bulky gas generator out of the woods at a remote building project. "I've always wanted a cabin in the woods," McDonnell tells reporters" but I lack tools and carpentry skills. Last April my family put up the shell of a cabin and over the summer a friend helped me continue work on the building. Another friend loaned me a portable generator which greatly speeded up the work. When winter set in, we stopped work till spring. Recently the owner of the generator asked if I could bring him the generator so he could winterize it. Extracting the generator from its remote location was not easy. But with the help of my wife and a sled, the job was accomplished." McDonnell is hoping he can borrow the generator again this spring. "Fingers crossed," he says.



Squib Cellar


Celebrity is like the number one million. By chance 1,000,000 gets all the attention while 999,999 and 1,000,001 rarely get mentioned.



I learned in meditation that what I thought were my east - west - north - south are actually my obsessive - compulsive - manic - depressive.



Atheists believe we got here through blind chance. But blind chance’s dark glasses are really just cool shades. 



I mark my territory by taking as many naps as possible around the house. 



According to surveys, the most frequently unanswered prayer is - O Lord, please don’t let me be misunderstood. 



Calling yourself God is blasphemy. 

But it’s closer to the truth than saying AI will one day have a soul. 

Comments

  1. Rest assured. If you paid me $1 million I could not tell you what kind of lights were on your ceiling in January.

    And about those naps, I guess you call those cat naps, right?

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  2. I'd venture to guess the ceiling light was a paneless wooden re-purposed barn window frame decorated with a garland of Christmasy conifer boughs with a hint of tinsel throughout.

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  3. So you were generating gas out by your cabin? I thought this was going to be a rustic retreat kind of place, not a gas generating station! Why don't you string an electric line from your gigantic solar array to your cabin? You could just flip a switch and create forest-like ambience, instead of fuming up your beautiful woods with bluish exhaust smoke. Thoreau would turn over in his grave! Blaspheme!

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    Replies
    1. \WW's comment about the array brings up memories for me of many visits to the Chicago Adler Planetarium with its 360 vault of stars and other celestial wonders where my aviator father and I spent hours considering our place in the universe. Thanks for the memory.

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