Squibs

 

 The easiest time to kick a bad habit is the last time you're indulging it.

I tell you my friend's face is like an elf's, and her husband's head is like a pumpkin. Please don't ask me which elf or what pumpkin.

Tact can put a blowhard in his place without inciting him to discharge his weapon.

The religious approach is to let God fix you. The psychological approach is to do-it-yourself.

In war (or anywhere) give us commanders a little older than young and sergeants a bit younger than old.

Youth does not believe in death. Middle age believes in the death of others. Old age says give me today and we'll talk again mañana. 

Chairman Joe