Thursday, February 28, 2019

                                   ôlmə nak

    al·ma·nac

Dictionary result for almanac
/ˈôlməˌnak,ˈalməˌnak/
noun: almanac; plural noun: almanacs; noun: almanack; plural noun: almanacks

An annual calendar containing important dates and statistical information such as astronomical data and tide tables.

Definition of almanac. 1: a publication containing astronomical and meteorological data for a given year and often including a miscellany of other information. 2 : a usually annual publication containing statistical, tabular, and general information.

An almanac is an annual publication listing a set of events forthcoming in the next year. It includes information like weather forecasts, farmers' planting dates, a calendar for the coming year, the times of such events and phenomena as anniversaries, sunrises and sunsets.

Almost all the popular almanacs published conversion tables. All the other almanacs mention only tzolkin days in the full or abbreviated notation described above. The astronomical almanac's algorithm for approximate solar position (1950-2050). Regular series included flanked almanacs, collections and reprints in an intense schedule of weekly, monthly and quarterly releases. Earlier examples include almanacs, town criers and written postings or other similar forms of infrequent content delivery mechanisms. The duties of cosmographer included publishing almanacs and sailing instructions.

The almanac's structure changed and its scope expanded over the years. A fundamental ephemeris is the basis from which apparent ephemerides, phenomena, and orbital elements are computed for astronomical, nautical, and surveyors' almanacs. Almanacs containing tables were published and instructions attached to sundials to enable the differences between local times to be computed.

Ho hum.

     Whew, so it is the almanac has evolved since its conception. I was concerned that deviation from expected norms may lead to my disqualification as a weekly contributor to the Wannaskan Almanac given these apparently strict parameters. Alas, it is not so, and here we are almost a full two months into year two. Go team.

     I realize though, my heart hasn’t been in it. Well, as far as adherence to the basic info-based composition, so today I’m going to make up for the rest of the year, that is, pay it forward, just in case, for some vague reason, I digress into some subject that has neither where or why of what we’re about. For example, say I spin off a tale about Badger or Mavie, MN or even Jamestown, ND or Stuart, FL or Carlisle, IA or Fair Oaks, CA, readers will think back to the blog of February 28 and think, “Oh yeah, he said this might happen, so it’s all good. No worries, he’s all paid up for this year.”

     So without further ado, let’s get at it so I can get these things off my chest. No. 1, Research can be fun, although I’d guess 90% of Minnesota toy factory employees surveyed, would disagree -- if you could secure their attention long enough. But I have found that research is only as boring as you make it, and this list, if not for the obvious, is no exception. My eyes gloss over at lists. My chin encounters my chest as my head drops in sheer exhaustion. There is no stall speed warning buzzer. If the list doesn’t capture my attention within the first 40-50 items, I’m asleep. I’m crashing.

     Here at my desk, that would mean a nasty impression of my drawer on my forehead i.e., the indentations of six checkblank boxes set side-by-side that separate pens, paperclips, beer bottle caps, ear plugs, a ring of new reflective florescent ‘trail markers,’ a 35mm film canister, two cassette tapes containing interviews of Mollie Miller, Syd Skogstad, and the Larson Bros, a 57-in-1 High Speed chip reader, a Panasonic Lumix Camera battery, 0.5 HB polymer leads, a Waltham pocket watch and chain, two hairbands, 2018 fishing license, a pocket-sized copy of the Treaties of 1836, 1837, 1842, 1854 & 1855, a one-inch red & white bobber, a Rumors wristwatch, a Swiss Army knife, and other items too numerous to list, so let’s get onto the much bigger list I started out ‘listing’.

The Astrological Sign for February 28 is Pisces.
My wife Jackie’s birthday was February 23, five days ago. Altho she’s a ‘cusper’ (she says) she pretty much fits this Pisces profile. Some astrological signs are ‘way off, but it’s funny when they’re ‘spot on’.


Famous Birthdays    
   
1923 – Charles Durning, American actor
https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001164/bio?ref_=nm_ov_bio_sm
Easily recognizable guy. “So that’s who this guy is...”
       
1940 – Mario Andretti, Italian-American race car driver
http://www.marioandretti.com/biography
Nice informational website.
   
1948 – Bernadette Peters, American actress and singer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYnm07et5Fs
   Although I can envision Bernadette so easily, (hubba-hubba) I had to watch a couple of her videos too, in one of which she sang, “I’m So Lonesome I could Cry,” and in another, “I’ll Be Seeing You.”

The other night the wife and I watched a movie, the name completely escaping me now, in which Dwight Yoakam sung a song that both of us had really liked years ago, and that now I cannot find in any of his albums that I can access on-line. I don’t know the name of it, but would recognize it in a heartbeat should I hear it again, despite now having his other songs playing randomly in my head.


Later references to country music conjured up Tammy Wynette & George Jones and other twangy renditions of heartbreak and sorrow that grated my eardrums like a screech against a chalkboard, this other stuff did not. Of course, by the 1960 and 70s, you couldn’t persuade me anything else in a country genre didn’t sound the same. But I digress ...

My daughter ... ummmm, well ‘dislikes’ Country Western music, as did I until I got into my thirties, and started listening to the likes of Garth Brooks, George Strait, Merl Haggard, and Marty Robbins, only because my late Uncle Clinton Palm, a pretty good guitarist and sax player, played Robbins' music, and sang his songs a lot, especially “El Paso,” and “Devil Woman.” When I heard “El Paso City,” the first time (1978) I realized the connection and why I liked the ballad story-telling aspect of Robbins’ songs.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZliX5mP7ATA

Clinton Palm, St. Cloud, Mn 1970

In the late 1990s I ‘discovered’ Patsy Cline as I drove my old blue 1985 Ford pickup to Aberdeen, SD area from Wannaska every couple weeks heading off cross country west of I-29 where her songs often accompanied me those evenings heading west and early mornings as I headed east.

I grew up with WHO on the kitchen radio in the 1950s and early 1960s. It can be the only explanation for the fact I know the words to a few Merle Haggard songs:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uU0Mw-NVmWQ.



I reckon I've written about this before, and Lord knows Joe is sick of hearing me retell it, but back in 2000 or thereabouts, Joe and his wife, and her niece 'Wrong Way McBride' and I ventured up to a Blue Grass Festival near Morden, Manitoba for an afternoon of blue grass & folk music. Through a Roseau County family named Hafdal, we had become acquainted with a regional blue grass band who were playing there that day.

Parking ourselves on lawn chairs and blankets spread on the grass near the makeshift stage, we were a ways away from the restroom facilities, somewhere I needed to go at some point in the program. Wearing my wide-brimmed western-style strawhat I had purchased in Louisiana, I made my circuitous way through the hundred or so families and couples who had settled in behind our position near the stage. Ahead loomed an obstruction of lawn chairs stock full of young and older men sitting almost across the whole of the congregated audience. As I approached I could see a few of them nodding and smiling at me. I checked to see if my fly was open. It was not. I looked behind me, wondering who it was that was giving them such pleasure, but nobody was there.

It was impossible to avoid direct eye contact going through their barrier, so I just came on with the intent of quickly going past, when one reached up to kindly slow me, and said, with a huge smile on his face, "W'all thought you was Merle Haggard!"

On other occasions, I also resembled Travis Tritt, I was told.


Famous Deaths
       
1953 - Jim Thorpe,  American athlete       
https://www.biography.com/people/jim-thorpe-9507017
    Jim Thorpe didn’t die on February 28>>the first website was incorrect. However, I read about Jim Thorpe fifty years ago, and thought he got a bum deal, but this biography enlarges his life to me and I can see the loss of his Olympic gold medals didn’t necessarily stop his upwards trajectory.

     
1979 - Mr Ed, the talking horse    
https://www.wideopenpets.com/secrets-didnt-know-mr-ed-talking-horse/
I wasn’t a fan of Mr. Ed. Lassie and/or Fury were more of my generation. Neither dog nor horse talked, although they possessed just enough sense and savvy to understand dire human situations to save the day. But what if?

    Just imagine Lassie, seeing that Timmy needed help, began hollering from the sudden tumble-down ruin of the old barn fifty yards from the house,
“Howlp! Howlp!”
Then Timmy, in intense pain, manages to gasp,
“Run for help, Lassie! Run ... for ...help!”
And Lassie replies, “Don’t worry, Grampa will hear me. He has his hearing aid on!”

2011 – Ernestine Jane Geraldine Russell, American actress
 I never knew that Jane Russell, the epitome of the WWII-era pinup girl, was born in Bemidji!
        
2016 - George Kennedy, American actor (hundreds of movies i.e., Cool Hand Luke)
https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001421/bio


2019 Daily Holidays that fall on February 28, include:

Digital Learning Day - February 28, 2019
Presumably beginning with your dominant hand
    
Fat Thursday - February 28, 2019 (Catholic)
The method employed by those who don’t like Fish Friday
    
Floral Design Day
For those husbands who miss the floral shop closing times on birthday, Valentines and anniversaries. 
    
Linus Pauling Day
http://scarc.library.oregonstate.edu/coll/pauling/calendar/index.html
    
National Chili Day - February 28, 2019 (Last Thursday in February)
Preparation for weekend deer camp cleanup with the guys
    
National Public Sleeping Day
Day after deer camp weekend cleanup with the guys
    
National Tooth Fairy Day
Explaining how one guy at deer camp was expecting a visit

2019 Weekly Holidays that include February 28, are:

Celebration of Chocolate Month
Make Mine Chocolate - (Feb 15- April 21,) 
National Eating Disorders Awareness Week - February 25 - March 3, 2019
The AA & Al-Anon of Over Eaters
    
Read Across America Week - February 25 - March 1, 2019
Early spring promotion of Wannaskan Almanac
    
Telecommuter Appreciation Week - February 24 - March 2, 2019
I tried to promote this concept, but The Company was slow to catch on.
    
Adopt a Rescued Rabbit Month
This sounds like the beginning of an invasive species story by an Australian author
    
African American History Month
Change this to ‘African American History Decade,’ instead. It’s been a long time in coming.
    
Beat the Heat Month
Referencing those people who flee the heat for colder climates. Local motels and resorts are currently packed.
    
International Boost Self Esteem Month
International Expect Success Month
International Friendship Month
International Hoof Care Month
Four international equine spa & fitness clinic promotions
    
Jobs in Golf Month
Including: Assistant Golf Professional, Golf Shop Assistant, Shop Staff/Professional, Outside Services Assistant, Outside Services Team Member, Manager of Player Development and Foundation Programs, Teaching Professional/Seasonal, Manager of Membership & Communications, Assistant Senior Assistant Golf Professional. Who knew?
     
Love the Bus Month
Who is our favorite bus driver? It's not too late to send an email or give him a call!
    
Marfan Syndrome Awareness Month
http://info.marfan.org/social-media-for-marfan-awareness-month-0
    
National Condom Month
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dInKYoJ349E
Back when I was a teenager, condoms were desperately hard to get. They were hidden behind drugstore counters and obtained only by asking a pharmacist for them, which was risky if he or she knew the family, “Does your mother know?” Or, at least in Missouri--The Show Me State-- you could buy them from men’s room wall ‘rubber’ dispensers.
    
National Fondue Month
People still fondue? Wasn’t that a fad back in the late 1970s?
    
National Grapefruit Month
I’m so tired of all these grapefruit promotion commercials that I‘ll be glad when February is over!
    
National Pet Dental Health Care Month
Right. I can just picture carpooling with others in Palmville to take our pets to the pet dentist.
    
National Prevent a Litter Month
Pre-empted by National Condom Awareness Month
    
National Sweet Potato Month
Who thinks of these things? “Sweet potatoes?” Yuk!
    
Pull Your Sofa Off the Wall Month
You know, I’ve been meaning to do that. Why just last week, I said to myself, “Good grief, I gotta remember to pull that damn sofa off the wall. What will the neighbors think?”
    
Return Shopping Carts to the Supermarket Month
They’re nothing but traffic hazards, all these stray shopping carts left on roadways and parkings between Roseau and Wannaska. There oughta be a law that they are equipped with all corner reflective devices at the very least.
    
Spay/Neuter Awareness Month
I’d think there’d be a bunch of highly nervous cats and dogs this month, sleeping with one eye open, their noses on high alert.
    
Spunky Old Broads Month
Not a highly advertised event in the current social climate.
    
Unchain a Dog Month
See “Spay/Neuter Awareness Month” above, if you’re the least bit sympathetic to your dog’s plight or if you’re still sore from your recent vasectomy.
    
Carnival of Venice - February 16, 2019 - March 5, 2019
A change of pace celebration in a faraway land. Today, February 28, it’s 53 degrees F for the high and 42 degrees F for the low, with just a 10% chance of rain in the forecast. Better than what we have, although the warmest day of our week in Wannaska, with a high of between 15-17 degrees F, above zero.

Kalevala's Day- Finnish Culture Day 28 February
The Kalevala begins with a creation myth that portrays the world as having been born of a pochard’s egg. In other respects the epic tells stories of dispute and expeditions of retaliation and proposals of the peoples of Kaleva and North Farm – as well as of the construction and theft of the magical Sampo. What is characteristic for the epic is the so-called trochaic tetrameter (also known as Kalevala meter) in which the verses follow a particular line of four trochaic feet.

Of the Kalevala’s characters, the most well known are Väinämöinen as the central figure of the epic, his ill-fated rival Joukahainen, Aino and Kullervo who are destined for a tragic fate, heroic artificer-smith Ilmarinen who crafted the Sampo, and Louhi, the Hag of the North (No Jane Russell, by any stretch of the imagination).

In Helsinki today, it’s 38 degrees F for a high and 20 degrees F for a low with a 20% chance of rain.

Indiantown, FL will have a high of 82 degrees F with a low of 61 F.