Sunday News

 

The Palmville Globe Volume 2 Number 26

Man Finds Missing Chair

Joe McDonnell, 79 and a resident of Palmville Twp, Minnesota, recently found a chair he thought he had left in a parking lot. "My wife and I recently volunteered to sit at a booth at our county fair to provide information about an organization we support. The booth had a table with information and we sat behind the table. The chairs at the booth were those slouchy beach chairs and were too low so we loaned the booth two folding chair from home. Someone else brought a folding chair so I took one of our chairs home. When I got home the chair was gone from the back seat. I thought I must have left the chair in the parking lot and pictured it being run over. I was about to drive 16 miles back to the fair when I thought to check the trunk and was relieved to see the chair lying there." In a later communication, McDonnell says a friend brought their other chair to them after the last shift at the booth. "The chairs are padded," McDonnell says, "and would be hard to replace."

Man Maintains Spot In Parade

Joe McDonnell, 79 and an amateur parade float driver, recently saved his float's place in the annual county fair parade. "I was asked to drive the float in the parade and before the parade I had to drive around town picking up float riders then make my way to the parade starting point. There was a lengthy delay starting the parade because one of the VFW color guards had forgotten his medicine and someone had to go get it. I had shut my float's engine off to save gas, and when the parade started, my float wouldn't move. One of our float riders was a mechanic and told me my shifter was in 'D'. Once I put the shifter in 'P', the engine started and we moved into the line of floats." In a follow-up email McDonnell reports that there were more floats in the parade than in any previous year. “Our float distributed sixty pounds of mini-candies to kids along the route. Another record."

Squib Cellar 

As The Wall nears completion, Palestinian tunnelers are even now being recruited by Mexican coyotes.

The main obstacle to personal success is our own expectations. 

It would be ironic to be roasted in hell at the same time you’re being eulogized at your celebration of life. 

Writer’s block is the inability to get into first gear. 

The wise writer always parks on a hill. 

Cliches are the salt of conversation, to be sprinkled judiciously. 

When I made my New Year’s resolutions I was creating my own little boot camp. 

My Marine Corps boot camp has slowly morphed into Club Med boot camp. 

The humble person is like an iceberg. As selfishness melts away, he's liable to tumble over, revealing a fresh ten percent.