Art Linkletter (Arthur Gordon Kelly) was born in the Canadian town of Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan, on July 17, 1912. He was abandoned as an infant, and then was adopted by an elderly evangelist by the name of Fulton Linkletter. The Linkletters moved to California when Art was 3.
Johnny Coco Pops (name changed to protect the innocent) was born on December 26, 1967 in the American town of Baudette, Minnesota. His parents moved him to Canada two days later. They have smartly refused to even visit California.
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| With apologies to our millions of California readers |
Art Linkletter graduated from San Diego High School at age 16. He then spent time traveling around America on trains doing odd jobs. This was quite common during the Great Depression.
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| Not actually Art Linkletter...possibly Steve Reynolds |
Johnny Coco Pops barely graduated from Rainy River High School in Ontario, Canada. He did not go to college and spent the summer drinking heavily. This led his parents into a great depression.
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| Canadian beer...it used to be affordable |
In 1934 Linkletter earned a bachelor's degree in teaching from San Diego State Teachers College. While attending San Diego State he played for the basketball team and was a member of the swimming team.
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| Records are sketchy, but one of these guys might be Linkletter. Or they could be the famous McDonnell quintuplets. |
After sobering up, JCP took two years of accounting in Thief River Falls Minnesota. After discovering that he did not know basic math, he immediately went into the next best thing...radio. This was likely what motivated Linkletter to join radio, which he did in the mid 1930's. Linkletter worked at KGB radio. This was not a front for Russian spying to the best of my knowledge. JCP worked at KSRQ and WCVZ. Linkletter eventually made it into television, as did JCP. Linkletter's first show was called "People are funny". He probably came up with the idea while walking around Walmart. JCP's first and only foray into television was when he hosted the Emmy's. This is why nobody can remember seeing him on television.
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| Available anywhere untalented writers and actors converge |
Linkletter wrote about a dozen books. His folksy humor had a broad appeal to many audiences. JCP has written 4 books and several dirty limericks. His folks have punished him many times for this.
As you can tell, there are very few real similarities between Johnny Coco Pops and Art Linkletter. This sham will end with a funny story from each of these two icons of humor.
From Art Linkletter: One boy’s answer, when asked what animal he wished to be, provided the funniest response, Linkletter once told an interviewer. An octopus, the boy said, so that he could grab the many bullies in his school and hit them with his “testicles.”
From JCP: Once, while I was subbing for a first grade class, I had the privilege of having the teacher's son in my class. We were talking about how the world spins. I let the class know that earth spins approximately 1000 miles per hour. Since that is true, if we were able to stand in one place while the earth spun underneath us, the whole world would pass beneath our feet in 24 hours and we would be right back where we started. The teacher's son piped up..."finally we are learning something we can use."
Ah, kids say the darndest things!
Canadian border guards say the funniest things. When WannaskaWriter told the guard he was going to Moose Jaw, the guard said, "Why in the world would anyone go to Moose Jaw?" WW was stuck dumb. "Good answer," said the guard and let him proceed.
ReplyDeleteThe guy on the boxcar in that image that you inferred could be me, resembled my dad as he used to wear a cap like that in his youth. Living a few doors from the railroad tracks as I did into my teens, I don't recall he and I ever ever discussed hopping trains like the hoboes did during the Great Depression of the early 30s.
ReplyDeleteStories were that the hoboes had coded signs of sorts that indicated which houses to stay away from, and which were more welcoming to folks in need; the latter was our house, as my mom sometimes left food dishes for them, or greeted them kindly if they came to our door. Both my mom and dad were watchful for others who tried to take things for granted. Although a kind hearted individual himself, Dad could have a way about him that left no one second guessing that either were pushovers.
As far as jumping onto a moving box car goes, at least when I grew up, rail beds were uneven rock-strewn surfaces of creosoted ties and rail sections (quite unlike the gleaming rails and smooth railbeds of the CN Railway I've ever seen) along which a misstep or stumble could cause a running person reaching for a boxcar ladder, off the ground a couple feet, to trip and fall under the looming hulk of a boxcar weaving back and forth. You either grab the ladder going by with all your strength and get both your feet on the lowest rung in one gymnastic move; or push away from its screeching relentless action with your whole being, recognizing lots of people have been killed or maimed for life doing the same thing.