The Palmville Globe Volume 2 Number 36
Man Fails to Get Audience
Joe McDonnell, 79 and residing in Palmville Township, Minnesota, recently attended an Authors Fair. "I've never written a book," McDonnell tells reporters, "though I have written for various publications over the years, most recently the blog that this story appears on. When I applied to appear at the Authors Fair, I was told the Fair was for authors who had published books. When I explained my situation I was given a space at the Fair. I thought there would be a time to read from my writings to the general public, but the general public never appeared. This was the first Authors Fair and I expect there will be a bigger crowd next year." In a later communication, McDonnell reports that reader view stats for his blog have increased. "One of my fellow bloggers had brought a QR code so fellow authors at the Fair could find our blog. "Marketing is not my strength," he writes.
Man Modifies Bumper
Joe McDonnell, 79 and an amateur body man, recently had to reconfigure his car's rear bumper. "When I replaced my license plates recently, I noticed the rear plate was held in place with a bolt and two screws instead of the usual two bolts. After removing the plate I saw one of the bolt holders had rusted out so the previous owner had drilled into the plate and then into the plastic bumper. I held the old plate over the new one and drilled holes into the new plate then bolted and screwed the new plate onto the bumper. As I tightened the bolt there was a pop as the bolt holder broke. I found a screw in my shop, drilled a hole through the plate into the bumper and secured the plate to the bumper." In a follow-up email, McDonnell says that the bolts holding the front plate in place presented no problem. "The rear plate bolts are much more exposed to road salt and corrosion," he explained.
Squib Cellar
The sea of ignorance is wide and deep. When our toes touch the sandbar of knowledge, we know that we are saved.
There are no stupid questions, only ignorant ones. We need to respect them because they make up 99% of all questions asked.
In the carrot or stick approach, most people opt for the stick. You only need one stick, while it would take an endless supply of carrots.
If you get too good at something, you'll be labeled an idiot savant. Or even worse, a genius.
We must face the world bravely, warts and all. Even on the days when we’re all wart.
A fever dream is a nightmare we can’t awake from.
Dwellers in the boondocks who used to be able to walk around naked, now must keep in mind when their next package will be delivered.
As we all know, as writers, whenever we publish our work for the public's view, we're in effect putting our neck on the chopping block. Fortunately, perhaps, most of the public think the axe is too heavy to swing; the guillotine too complicated, and so walk on by ignoring our efforts altogether, leaving us questioning whether or not they even read what we wrote. Further, our blog sponsor has made it difficult to leave a comment, requiring one to sign into Google or otherwise identify themselves; most of those who do leave comments here -- are fellow writers -- and that can be brutal ,,,
ReplyDeleteI am not surprised you blurred the entry requirement " ... was for authors who had published books." I mean, really, your name is cast in bronze somewhere on the library's fireplace mantle isn't it? As founders or something?-- Well, at the very least, listed as you once being on its Board of Directors. I'm sure of it; that's a Free Pass to any of their gigs. The only reason I was allowed in was you mentioned me as a fellow contributor to the Wannaska Almanac, who had a printed QR Code, and offered its use as a promotional item, leaving both your hands free to turn the pages of your blog post as you read to your adoring public -- who didn't show up only because it was held on a rainy Thursday evening.
I was going to write about the fair this past Thursday, but saw you had this in the wings for today; and perhaps predicate what it was I was going to describe, or be its complete opposite and look the fool. But that's never really bothered me:) You did a fine job.
I just read what you wrote.
DeleteWow, that surprised me, you'd think that Subaru you bought new this year, the Hybrid version right? Was under warranty for that license plate plastic frame failure; I'm pretty sure it covers everything from bow to stern. Oughta check that out. My 28-year old Legacy Outback's rust-perforated Minnesota auto body still looks good everywhere there's paint. I put a set of license plates on my 33-year old GMC pickup yesterday. Its license plate mount is steel, but the plastic insert for one of the screws used to hold the plate broke as I loosened it, so I had to use a 1/4 inch bolt and nut instead,. Yes, living in Palmville isn't for the weak minded; you have to have your wits about you 24/7. Hail ye brother!
ReplyDeletegetting comments from my fellow writers, always makes my day. am I naive? i thought this was a Love fest
ReplyDelete