Contortions

 

  As I look over the names of the 56 signers of the Declaration of Independence, I'm embarrassed to admit I only recognize a handful of them: Thomas Jefferson, of course, and John Adams. And John Hancock, who signed in an extra-large font.

   There there's Eldridge Gerry from Massachusetts. That rings a bell. Oh yes, he's the man that the gerrymander is named after. In fact it was on this day in 1812 that he was first accused of creating a weirdly shaped district that looked like a mythical salamander. The borders of a gerrymander are drawn to give the party in power an advantage in the next election. An opposition newspaper drew a cartoon of the gerrymandered district which sent poor Gerry to the halls of infamy forevermore.

   It wasn't fair really. He was a decent person overall. Gerry (it was pronounced with a hard 'g' back then) was born in 1744 into a wealthy shipping family in the town of Marblehead, north of Boston. Marblehead was an important port in those days. The Gerry family opposed British taxes since they interfered with their business. Gerry took an interest in politics at a young age and joined other patriots in protesting British impositions. He was in charge of hiding arms and gunpowder from the British, and at one point sent a large cache to Concord. It was these arms the British were looking for when the American War of Independence was sparked in the battles of Concord and Lexington.

   During the war, Gerry and his family helped the Americans by shipping war supplies where they were needed. Unlike many others, the Gerrys did not gouge the government for their services. During the war Gerry served in the Continental Congress. After the war, he was a member of the Constitutional Convention, but was one of three members who did not sign the final draft. He hated slavery and did not want it mentioned in the Constitution.

   He was elected to the first House of Representatives where he worked on the Bill of Rights which was later added to the Constitution. President John Adams sent Gerry to France as a diplomat where he helped avert war with France. When Gerry's brother got into financial trouble, Gerry left government and returned home to help his brother pay his debts. 

   In 1810, Gerry was elected governor of Massachusetts. It was then that members of his party drew up their redistricting boundaries around a string of towns north of Boston. Gerry himself found the plan "highly disagreeable," but his party convinced him to sign the legislation to preserve the seat. The seat was saved, but Gerry was defeated in the election, mainly over this issue.

   Gerry was pretty much broke after helping his brother and he asked his friend, President James Madison, for a federal job. In 1813 he became Madison's Vice President. The following year he fell ill and died. He is the only signer of the Declaration of Independence buried in Washington, D.C.

Monstrous!
(Unless your party is doing it.)