The Beach As Crime Scene

     Chairman Joe here. Welcome to the Wannaskan Almanac for Friday.

    I always think of the beach as a fun place. At least I did before I learned about skin cancer. In my younger days, the beach was a place to swim, to build castles, and to eat the snacks my grandmother had brought along.
     But the beach can be deadly. Look at poor Magellan. We always hear about Magellan's Circumnavigation of the globe. That should be changed to semi-navigation. He got mixed up in an inter-tribal squabble in the Philippines and was killed on a beach on the island of Cebu.
     Then there's James Cook, the famous British explorer. Got himself stabbed to death on the beach while trying to kidnap the king of Hawaii. Bad move. And even Robinson Crusoe killed several cannibals while rescuing his man Friday from a beach cookout.
     So I wasn't surprised to learn that Cicero was assassinated on this day in 43 BC on the beach in front of his Italian villa. We know Cicero as a great writer and orator, but he considered his political career more important, even though that's what got him killed.
     Cicero was born into a well-to-do but humble family on their farm south of Rome. The family name means chickpea. One of his ancestors had a nose shaped like a chickpea and the name stuck. Romans often had down-to-earth names, Flavius means bean, Catalus, puppy, etc.
    Cicero served in the military for a couple of years, then studied law and became a highly successful lawyer. He worked his way up through the political system to counsel, the equivalent to our president. There was an attempt to overthrow the Republic while he was counsel and Cicero had the conspirators executed without due process. This earned him some powerful enemies.
    During the civil wars that led to Julius Caesar becoming dictator, Cicero worked to restore the Republic. After Caesar's death, Cicero was named an enemy of the state by Mark Anthony, one of the new rulers of Rome. Being named an enemy of the state was a really dangerous thing so Cicero decided to nip over to Greece till things settled down.
   That was when Roman soldiers caught up with him. Being a philosopher, Cicero extended his neck for the death blow. Being a veteran, the soldier knew beheadings are messy, so he stabbed Cicero first then beheaded him. Anthony wanted the head to display in the Forum. Also the hands that had written the violent attacks against him.
    Cicero had posthumous revenge when Anthony, in the mother of all midlife crises, dumped his faithful wife and took up with Cleopatra. Very bad move. Watch the movie.

Cicero

Larry Domincick, President of the Town of Cicero. These two have to be related.