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Tuesday, April 10, 2018

Welcome to the Wannaskan Almanac for Tuesday, April 10. I am writing to you from the most southern suburb of Wannaska. April 10 has a whole boatload of daily holidays that fall on it. They include:
ASPCA Day...why not adopt a pet from a shelter!
Encourage a Young Writer Day...I am by far the youngest writer at the Wannaskan Almanac, so drop me a line!
Equal Pay Day...Done.
Golfer's Day...or just wear some weird looking checkered pants.
International Safety Pin Day...training will be supplied by OSHA.
National Be Kind to Lawyers Day...so no jokes? Not even a lawyer awoke from surgery and asked, "Why are all the blinds drawn?" The doctor answered, "There's a fire across the street, and we didn't want you to think you had died." Okay, I will refrain.
National Cinnamon Crescent Day...now we are getting somewhere. A holiday that must be celebrated. I shall wake up and demand Cinnamon Crescents for breakfast. We will see what happens.
National Farm Animals Day...celebrate by drinking a pint of bacon beer!
National Library Day...what a great day to check behind your couch for overdue books. Pay that fine with a smile, it is National Library Day!
National Sibling Day...Celebrated by those who have a brother or sister named Ling.
Salvation Army Founder's Day...the red pots are gone but this great organization continues to work. Why not make a donation out of the blue...for the red!

Two famous actors were born on April 10. They are Omar Sharif (1932) and Steven Seagal (1952). Omar Sharif starred in Lawrence of Arabia and Doctor Zhivago. Steven Segal starred in Under Seige and Above the Law. Ah...movies used to be good. Maybe only one good actor was born that day. I leave it up to you to decide which one was good. We will possibly have differing opinions. That isn't a bad thing.


Now to a handsel for you. Handsel, of course, is our word of the day. It is a noun, and is a derivative of an Old English and a Middle English word. Hence, the word must be either Narnian or from Middle Earth. By now, Lewis asking me what I am Tolkien about. With that said, I will cease the punning and take off running with my next section.

The handsel is a poem, that may or may not rhyme. It must be about April 10, and all that makes up this totally awesome day!

It is April tenth
So many have spent the previous night
Waiting,
expecting,
unable to sleep.
Eager to see what this special day brings!
Scrambled eggs for breakfast.
Is that toast? With butter no less!
Can we go to school?
And have an extra helping of homework?
Homework done, checked it twice
teacher will know that I am nice!
Dinner of liver and onions
has never tasted so good.
Two hours of monotonous television
and then off to bed.
Best April tenth ever!

An original poem by yours truly...dedicated to those who can actually write poetry! I would also like to apologize to all who are celebrating International Safety Pin Day. I meant no disrespect!

Give yourself a high five if you guessed that a handsel is a gift. It could also be a first installment or payment. So to those of you hoping for an April seventeenth poem...I will leave it at that! As always, you can email your comments to me at ffefreekshow@hotmail.com I consider each of your emails a handsel, or if they are from ladies...a Gretel!





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