Sunday News

 

The Palmville Globe Volume 1 Number 21

Man Assists with Food Distribution 

Joe McDonnell, 78 and residing in Palmville Twp, Minnesota, was recently part of a group giving out excess food meant for those in need. “I’ve been watching reports on the news of charity workers being shot while distributing food, but this was nothing like that,” McDonnell tells the press. “Our charitable donations warehouse had received too much food and rather than let it go to waste, it was offered to the general public no matter how well off they might be. The food was in boxes on a long line of pallets in the parking lot near the rink. My pallet had frozen chicken breasts and breaded Brussels sprouts and grapefruit among other things. As the mostly SUVs slowly drove along the line, I threw packages of my items into the open backs  of the vehicles, often having to rearrange the food thrown in from the previous pallets. There was really no rush but it felt hectic and I almost got my foot rolled over once. The leftover food was gathered onto four pallets and returned to our local storage facility.”

Man Revisits Old College Staple

Joe McDonnell, 78, and an amateur food scientist, recently cooked an old college favorite. “Umami is big now," McDonnell reveals in a written report. "Umami is Japanese for essence of deliciousness. Tomato paste is supposedly loaded with umami. The trouble with tomato paste as umami is that only a teaspoon at a time is needed. The remainder of the can develops a white mold in the fridge before another teaspoon is needed. In my college days I used to eat tomato paste by the can. I mixed it with a little hot water and poured it over a 7 ounce box of cooked pasta. I had a large appetite back then and I could fill my belly for less than fifty cents. This was well before ramen came to the US. The other day I turned an open can of paste into spaghetti con impasto italiano. If only I had the zest of a Meyer lemon, it would have been a ten out of ten.”

Squib Cellar

Jesus said “Wherever two are gathered in my name….” He might have added, “one will be a fundamentalist and one will be a liberal.”

Morning and evening meditation are the buoys, port and  starboard, that guide the pilgrim along life’s channel. Nevertheless, the pilgrim often runs aground. 

I used to just get up. Now I must give thought to how I'm going to leverage my rise.

The prime question for the elderly person with health, mind, and money should be, 

What am I waiting for?

A prostitute is a kind of nurse who cares for the client in the moment, but wants them to go home soon...and forever. 

The good teacher uses her magic wand to clarify the muddy streams in her students' minds.

Homemade bread freshness guide-

Day one: great for sandwiches 

Day two: good for sandwiches 

Day three: good for toast

Day four: great for toast

Day five: croutons